THE CLOUD

Psalm 105:39
 39 He spread a ^acloud for a covering; and fire to give light in the night.

Fire is there to lead you in the night and a cloud is there to lead you in the day. 

I was listening to Jon Courson on the way to work last week and there was one part of the message in particular that spoke to me.  He read Psalm 105:39.  This scripture is about the Isrealites and how they were led through the desert by God.  When he wanted them to stop, the cloud would stop.  When he wanted them to go...he would lead them.  The kids and I have been reading about the Isrealites, and how he always provided for them.  He gave them food when they needed it, dried the rivers to walk through them, and showed them the direction they needed to go. 

I feel like there are always so many decisions I have to make.  I pray that God will help me make the right choice.  I ask Him what he wants me to do and to help me feel confident about decisions I've made.  Jon Courson spoke about God's Will.  He said that if you are loving God, He will give you the desires of your heart.  I have heard this so many times... but it finally clicked.  God will guide you, just like the cloud guided the Isrealites....you do what's natural, what feels right. 

Seriously, that hit me!  I am always weighing the options, tormenting myself..."God speak to me" I say...  SO many opinions, so many worries, so many different things that can alter and persuade me.  AND finally , I got it.   God will lead me in the direction he wants me to go.  If I have a strong desire to do something, and I am loving God and following God in my Life... than I should have peace about my decisions.  Thank you Lord for giving me this peace. 

The right path

Do you ever feel like you are looking at life through a small hole?  Like you can't see the whole picture?  You can see glimpses, you can see beauty, you can see the daily things that are happening... but overall you can't always see it all.  I often feel like this.  Does God want me to do this.. or that?  Does He want me to go here or there.  So often I feel like I have to make choices without knowing the BIG picture.  I want to follow God's will for my life... but it is sometimes hard to know if the path you are choosing it really HIS.  Only God knows the big picture and he has it all completely painted for me.  I know I have to just let him direct my life... but sometimes there are so many external things that get in the way, I start to doubt myself.  Is this what I should be doing?  Is this the best for my children?  etc... God wants to direct our paths.  We just have to let him.   " Show me your ways Lord, Teach me your paths." Psalm 25:4

Rode my bike up the hill today. Felt good until I stopped at the top. Suddenly my head started to beat hard and I felt dizzy! I felt awful! This happened once before when I rode my bike up a hill. It sure made me feel horrible. And it's scary. I had to sit on  he sidewalk until my vision improved and I felt better. I was then able to ride back home and went for a walk at the ballpark. But as I walked at the ballpark I heard a song called look like love by Britt Nicole. It was the perfect song for my situation ... "Have you ever felt like your just rushin through life" ... It said "we gotta slow it down.... When we gonna stop runnin... It's up to you and me to leave a legacy..." My life is super crazy busy right now. School is out in 2 weeks so I know my life is going to slow down but during the school year it's tough because I haven't figured out how to be a part time teacher, mom of 4, taxi driver, housekeeper, wife, etc.... And take care of myself the way I really need to. After getting dizzy and them hearing that song, it spoke to me so much. I just really need to make more time for myself. My husband has been saying that too, but it's so hard with a baby, a 3 year old and 2 other children! Plus I have a lot of responsibilities to take care of the house and at my school I can't wait for the summer because my husband will be home too to help me and I'll be able to take care of myself and exercise more. Thanks Britt for your inspirational songs. It reminded me of the importance of slowing down and making sure I am taking time to live how God intended.

Shape Me

Shape me... My husband is learning how to shape a surfboard today. There was a lot of discussion before he even started about what he wants out for of the board. What type of performance he wants... How fast he would want to surf, how steady he wanted to feel, how much control did he wanted to have on the waves... The list goes on. Then he began to measure. Trying to be so exact. Next cutting off the excess foam before beginning to shape it. Shaping it ever so carefully. Trying not to put too much pressure on the tools but needing to go over it back and forth, smoothing it out. It made me think about my life and how I need to be shaped. Certainly that applies to both physically and spiritually. Physically - I need to plan out what I want out of my body. What do I want to be able to do. If I am not healthy, I I can't do the things I need to do. I need to "measure" what I am eating every day so I can be the size that God intended me to be. (after I just had a frapacinno..lol) How do I want to feel each day... I need to cut out the fat lie he cut off the bad parts of the foam. I need to shave off my flab like he shaves the board! I wish it was easier! Spiritually - I need to allow God to shape me. I need to be able to be steady in my walk with God. I need to plan ahead and make sure I spend time in His word. I need to cut out the things that prevent me from being clean as the shaper wants to clean the board and cut off the excess. Allowing God to shape us is hard. But he knows what is best for us. He has a perfect plan.

Happy Easter!  He is Risen! 

I am so thankful for My Savior.  That He sacrificed himself for me.  He has blessed me so abundantly.  I want to make Him more of a priority in my life.  I am taking baby steps to do this, but I need to do it even MORE.  I pray that I can make this resurrection day, a day for myself to be resurrected too!  A re-birth of my journey.  A fresh breath of seeking His Truths!

A friend of mine just told me that sometimes its good to keep things to yourself when you make a decision to follow Gods calling. I have been led to make some major decision lately that people have questioned. Are you sure you want to do this? Did you pray about it? Why are you doing that? It Makes me question myself of course. But I truly feel that God is showing me a new path that has only opened up because of prayer. The bible says to pray without ceasing. One of my situations had been a prayer of mine for at least 4 years. After 4 years of discussion, prayer, research...etc... I feel like God is showing me His path. I am excited for This new adventure, and I know it won't always be easy. But I am praying that God will bless me thought it. I still doubt myself... And that makes it hard. But I know that I can do all things thought Christ who strengthens me. God is in control! Yeah! That is certainly good to know...don't you think?

Leap of Faith

Leap of Faith

Tomorrow I am taking a big leap of faith.  I am enrolling my children in a homeschooling academy.  

Many people think I'm crazy!  But the bottom line is, I feel like that is what God is calling me to do.  I have always wanted to try it... and I feel that I am finally ready.  There will be challenges... I KNOW.  I'm nervous about taking the step BUT excited.  I hope I'm doing the right thing.  I call it the one year experiment.  

I'm excited to see if working with my kids more one on one will be more effective.  I can't wait to include some BIBLE teaching in their curriculum.... Praying that this is the right thing for them!